Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Talli Hoke Girne Se:::BEER IN 17 SECS


TALLI HOKE GIRNE SE ...SAMJHI HUMNE GRAVITY...

THE WHOLE COUNTRY IS STILL BOWLED OVER BY THE SPIRIT AND MUSINGS OF "RANG DE BASANTI".I TOO LIKED THE FILM BUT THAT APART I WAS HIGHLY IMPRESSED BY THE SHOT IN WHICH DJ AND SUKHI DRINK BEER OVER A CLIFF SORT OF PLACE.SO WE (read:beer drinkers b wing) HAD A MAD COMPETION OF FINISHING A BEER BOTTLE FASTEST (BOTTOMS UP).
PRACTICE OVER THE YEARS AND WITH THE KIND OF ABILITY I HAVE GENERATED I WAS ABLE TO ACCOMPLISH THE TASK IN 18 SECS. AND WAS BEATEN TO FIRST PLACE WITH A STUNNING 17 SEC PERFORMANCE BY DHEERAJ.
BUYS COMING UP WITH BETTER PERFORMANCE REPORT HERE.

I HAD 5 BEERS THAT NITE WHICH WAS ALSO THE DAY OUR MINORS GOT OVER.
TILL I RITE IN AGAIN

HAPPY HUKKA PANI

Thought 4 The DAY

If there is somthing that You think You will regret in the morning then What do you do?

follow my fundas:
JUST SLEEP TILL NOON

Monday, December 05, 2005

Dr. kalam's speech :read it do it

I have three visions for India.

In 3000 years of our history, people from all over the world have come and invaded us, captured our lands, conquered our minds. From Alexander onwards. The Greeks, the Turks, the Moguls, the Portuguese, the British, the French, the Dutch, all of them came and looted us, took over what was ours. Yet we have not done this to any other nation. We have not conquered anyone.
We have not grabbed their land, their culture, their history and tried to enforce our way of life on them. Why? Because we respect the freedom of others. That is why my first vision is that of FREEDOM. I believe that India got its first vision of this in 1857, when we started the war of independence. It is this freedom that we must protect and nurture and build on. If we are not free, no one will respect us.

My second vision for India is DEVELOPMENT. For fifty years we have been a developing nation. It is time we see ourselves as a developed nation. We are among top 5 nations of the world in terms of GDP We have 10 percent growth rate in most areas. Our poverty levels are falling. Our achievements are being globally recognized today. Yet we lack the self-confidence to see ourselves as a developed nation, self- reliant and self-assured. Isn't this incorrect?

I have a THIRD vision. India must stand up to the world. Because I believe that, unless India stands up to the world, no one will respect us. Only strength respects strength. We must be strong not only as a military power but also as an economic power. Both must go hand-in-hand. My good fortune was to have worked with three great minds. Dr. Vikram Sarabhai of the Dept. of space, Professor Satish Dhawan, who succeeded him and Dr.Brahm Prakash, father of nuclear material. I was lucky to have worked with all three of them closely and consider this the great opportunity of my life.

I see four milestones in my career:
Twenty years I spent in ISRO. I was given the opportunity to be the project director for India's first satellite launch vehicle, SLV3. The one that launched Rohini. These years played a very important role in my life of Scientist.
After my ISRO years, I joined DRDO and got a chance to be the part of India's guided missile program. It was my second bliss when Agni met its mission requirements in 1994.

The Dept. of Atomic Energy and DRDO had this tremendous partnership in the recent nuclear tests, on May 11 and 13. This was the third bliss. The joy of participating with my team in these nuclear tests and proving to the world that India can make it, that we are no longer a developing nation but one of them. It made me feel very proud as an Indian.

The fact that we have now developed for Agni a re-entry structure, for which we have developed this new material. A Very light material called carbon-carbon. One day an orthopedic surgeon from Nizam Institute of Medical Sciences visited my laboratory. He lifted the material and found it so light that he took me to his hospital and showed me his patients. There were these little girls and boys with heavy metallic calipers weighing over three Kg. each, dragging their feet around. He said to me: Please remove the pain of my patients. In three weeks, we made these Floor reaction Orthosis 300-gram calipers and took them to the orthopedic center. The children didn't believe their eyes. From dragging around a three kg. load on their legs, they could now move around!

Their parents had tears in their eyes. That was my fourth bliss!

Why is the media here so negative?
Why are we in India so embarrassed to recognize our own strengths, our achievements?
We are such a great nation.
We have so many amazing success stories but we refuse to acknowledge them.
Why?
We are the first in milk production.
We are number one in Remote sensing satellites.
We are the second largest producer of wheat.
We are the second largest producer of rice.
Look at Dr. Sudarshan, he has transferred the tribal village into a self-sustaining, self driving unit. There are millions of such achievements but our media is only obsessed in the bad news and failures and disasters.

I was in Tel Aviv once and I was reading the Israeli newspaper. It was the day after a lot of attacks and bombardments and deaths had taken place. The Hamas had struck. But the front page of the newspaper had the picture of a Jewish gentleman who in five years had transformed his desert land into an orchid and a granary. It was this inspiring picture that everyone woke up to. The gory details of killings, bombardments, deaths, were inside in the newspaper, buried among other news.

In India we only read about death, sickness, terrorism, crime. Why are we so NEGATIVE? Another question : Why are we, as a nation so obsessed with foreign things?
We want foreign TVs, we want foreign shirts. We want foreign technology. Why this obsession with everything imported. Do we not realize that self-respect comes with self-reliance ?

I was in Hyderabad giving this lecture, when a 14 year old girl asked me for my autograph. I asked her what her goal in life is.
She replied: I want to live in a developed India.
For her, you and I will have to build this developed India. You must proclaim. India is not an under-developed nation; it is a highly developed nation. Do you have 10 minutes? Allow me to come back with a vengeance.

Got 10 minutes for your country? If yes, then read; otherwise, choice is yours.

YOU say that our government is inefficient.
YOU say that our laws are too old.
YOU say that the municipality does not pick up the garbage.
YOU say that the phones don' t work, the railways are a joke, the airline is the worst in the world, mails never reach their destination.
YOU say that our country has been fed to the dogs and is the absolute pits.
YOU say, say and say.
What do YOU do about it?

Take a person on his way to Singapore..... Give him a name - YOURS. Give him a face - YOURS. YOU walk out of the airport and you are at your International best. In Singapore you don't throw cigarette butts on the roads or eat in the stores. YOU are as proud of their Underground links as they are. You pay $5 (approx. Rs.60) to drive through Orchard Road (equivalent of Mahim Causeway or Pedder Road) between 5 PM and 8 PM.

YOU comeback to the parking lot to punch your parking ticket if you have over stayed in a restaurant or a shopping mall irrespective of your status identity. In Singapore you don't say anything, DO YOU?
YOU wouldn't dare to eat in public during Ramadan, in Dubai. YOU would not dare to go out without your head covered in Jeddah. YOU would not dare to buy an employee of the telephone exchange in London at 10 pounds ( Rs.650) a month to, "see to it that my STD and ISD calls are billed to someone else." YOU would not dare to speed beyond 55 mph (88 km/h) in Washington and then tell the traffic cop, Jaanta hai main kaun hoon (Do you know who I am?). I am so and so's son. Take your two bucks and get lost."

YOU wouldn't chuck an empty coconut shell anywhere other than the garbage pail on the beaches in Australia and New Zealand. Why don't YOU spit Paan on the streets of Tokyo? Why don't YOU use examination jockeys or buy fake certificates in Boston??? We are still talking of the same YOU. YOU who can respect and conform to a foreign system in other countries but cannot in your own. You who will throw papers and cigarettes on the road the moment you touch Indian ground. If you can be an involved and appreciative citizen in an alien country, why cannot you be the same here in India?

Once in an interview, the famous Ex-municipal commissioner of Bombay, Mr.Tinaikar, had a point to make. "Rich people's dogs are walked on the streets to leave their affluent droppings all over the place," he said. "And then the same people turn around to criticize and blame the authorities for inefficiency and dirty pavements. What do they expect the officers to do? Go down with a broom every time their dog feels the pressure in his bowels?

In America every dog owner has to clean up after his pet has done the job. Same in Japan. Will the Indian citizen do that here?" He's right. We go to the polls to choose a government and after that forfeit all responsibility. We sit back wanting to be pampered and expect the government to do everything for us whilst our contribution is totally negative. We expect the government to clean up but we are not going to stop chucking garbage all over the place nor are we going to stop to pick a up a stray piece of paper and throw it in the bin. We expect the railways to provide clean bathrooms but we are not going to learn the proper use of bathrooms.


We want Indian Airlines and Air India to provide the best of food and toiletries but we are not going to stop pilfering at the least opportunity. This applies even to the staff who is known not to pass on the service to the public. When it comes to burning social issues like those related to women, dowry, girl child and others, we make loud drawing room protestations and continue to do the reverse at home. Our excuse?


"It's the whole system which has to change, how will it matter if I alone forego my sons' rights to a dowry." So who's going to change the system? What does a system consist of? Very conveniently for us it consists of our neighbors, other households, other cities, other communities and the government. But definitely not me and YOU. When it comes to us actually making a positive contribution to the system we lock ourselves along with our families into a safe cocoon and look into the distance at countries far away and wait for a Mr. Clean to come along & work miracles for us with a majestic sweep of his hand or we leave the country and run away.

Like lazy cowards hounded by our fears we run to America to bask in their glory and praise their system. When New York becomes insecure we run to England. When England experiences unemployment, we take the next flight out to the Gulf. When the Gulf is war struck, we demand to be rescued and brought home by the Indian government. Everybody is out to abuse and rape the country. Nobody thinks of feeding the system. Our conscience is mortgaged to money.

Dear Indians, The article is highly thought inductive, calls for a great deal of introspection and pricks one's conscience too....I am echoing J.F.Kennedy's words to his fellow Americans to relate to Indians.....

"ASK WHAT WE CAN DO FOR INDIA AND DO WHAT HAS TO BE DONE TO MAKE INDIA WHAT AMERICA AND OTHER WESTERN COUNTRIES ARE TODAY"

Lets do what India needs from us.

Friday, December 02, 2005

weather forcasting


makes sense dosnt it.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

GO TO HELL CHAPPEL

This man should be fired. The Indian cricket team's Australian coach Greg Chappell gave the finger to cricket fans in my home town, Calcutta (Kolkata). This after the team lost an international one-day match! How arrogant can a man get? He should have been ashamed of his team's performance; instead, he insulted the fans!
Granted there's no love lost between him and Calcutta, where many fans have been upset since he dropped local idol Sourav Ganguly from the team. The police advised the Aussie to stay in his hotel room for his own safety. Instead, he showed the finger!
A newspaper showed a finger thrust out of a window of the team bus, saying it was Chappell's.
But he claimed he was just nursing an injured finger, not sticking it out at anyone. Ha! Why stick an injured finger out of the window? Did it need some fresh air?
The incident was thoroughly in keeping with the character of the man. Chappell was a great cricketer in his day, but he and his brother, Ian, were also known for their mean tactics and aggressive behaviour.
He has a contract to coach the Indian team till 2007. But he should be sacked immediately. Indian cricket officials can surely afford to pay him off since they earn so much money from television and match ticket sales; cricket is the most popular sport in India.
India have not done well under Chappell's coaching. They lost shamefully against South Africa in Calcutta on Friday. The final score -- India 188 all out vs South Africa 189 for no loss -- said it all: India were completely outplayed.
But the Aussie's not the only one who should be sent off.
The great Sachin Tendulkar should also be dropped temporarily as a warning that he cannot take his place for granted. He scored only two runs in what was his 357th match, a world record. No one has played more than him and all he scores is two!
Of course, he can do better than that. If he does not get a big score in the next match, he will do so in the one after that. After all, he is one of the world's greatest cricketers. But he has been keeping indifferent health and unpredictable form. It's time he is dropped occasionally to try out other players. As it is, he plays only when he feels up to it, when his health permits. Why not let the Indian selectors decide when to play him rather than leaving the decision to him?
My son, like legions of Sachin fans, will insist Sachin is indispensable.
But the Aussie's time has come.
PS: India's current captain, Rahul Dravid, also proved a dead loss as a leader and a batsman, scoring only six. Maybe it's time to bring back Ganguly? Surely, if Sachin can stay on despite such unpredictable form, why not bring back the Calcutta boy who was the most successful Indian captain ever?

MORE PICS :





GORGEOUS SUNSETS & SUNRISES IN THE HIMALAYAS





INCREDIBLE INDIA : HIMACHAL PRADESH (MAY 2004)































INDEX:
1>BEAS RIVER ;HIGHWAY TO MANALI FROM CHANDIGARH
2>CHITKUL;KINNAUR
3>SARAHAN;
4>KALPA;
5>KALPA.

DESPARADO REDS

With Manchester United slipping down the champions league table the premiership table struggling in the league cup the FA cup and Roy Keane departing .........everything is in a mess. The ORIGINAL RED DEVIL ROY KEANE was shown the door after what can be best described as the golden age of MANCHESTER UNITED when we won 8 premierships, 3 FA cups and the ultimate prize the CHAMPIONS LEAGUE.

Never will I forget the contributions of Roy Keane on the magical night in Turin in the semi finals of the Champions League.Reds today lack the zing. Rooney Ruud Ronaldo do it for us

Manchester United will again be the best freaking team in the the world and the 3 R's hold the key

Till then keep going the REDS as you are the proud occupants of the RED CORNER and bash up CHELSEA like you did last week.voila screw them like never before till RED corner win against BLUE corner.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

YORKED

A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's life. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl" The man says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!" "Oh then it will say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl' " - the policeman answers. "But I am not an American!" - says the man. "Oh, what are you then? " The man says: - "I am a Pakistani!" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog.

ACTUAL INSPIRATION

# Local variable
Mein pal do pal ka shayar hoon,
pal do pal meri kahani hai
pal do pal meri hasti hai..

# Global variable

Main har ik pal ka shayar hoon
har ik pal meri kahani hai
har ik pal meri hasti hai

# Null pointers
Mera jeevan kora kagaz
kora hi reh gaya.

# Dangling pointers
Maut bhi aati nahi
jaan bhi jati nahin.

# Goto
Ajeeb dastan hai yeh
Kahan shuru kahan khatam
Ye manzilen hain kaun si
Na woh samajh sake na hum

# Untrackable bug
Aye ajnabi,
tu bhi kabhi,
awaaz de kahin se.

# Unexpected bug (esp during presentation to client)
Ye kya hua,
Kaise hua,
Kab hua,
Kyon hua.

# And then to the client
Jab hua,
Tab hua,
O chhodo, ye na socho.

Top 20 Replies by Programmers to Testers when their programs dont work

20. "That's weird..."
19. "It's never done that before."
18. "It worked yesterday."
17. "How is that possible?"
16. "It must be a hardware problem."
15. "What did you type in wrong to get it to crash?"
14. "There is something funky in your data."
13. "I haven't touched that module in weeks!"
12. "You must have the wrong version."
11. "It's just some unlucky coincidence."
10. "I can't test everything!"
9. "THIS can't be the source of THAT."
8. "It works, but it hasn't been tested."
7. "Somebody must have changed my code."
6. "Did you check for a virus on your system?"
5. "Even though it doesn't work, how does it feel?
4. "You can't use that version on your system."
3. "Why do you want to do it that way?"
2. "Where were you when the program blew up?" And the

numero uno Reply by Programmers when their programs don't work: GuessGuess.............
Come on, even u say it ......

Guess.............







"It works on my machine"

Statutory Warning :Following steps may be injurious to Job.


1 - Live to relax!
2 - Love your bed, it is your temple!
3 - Relax in the day, so that you can sleep at night!
4 - Work is holy, so don't attack it!
5 - Don't do something tomorrow, that you can do the day afterwards!
6 - Work as little as possible. Let the others do what needs to be done!
7 - Don't worry, nobody died from doing nothing, but you could get hurt at work!
8 - If you feel like doing work, sit down and wait until that feeling goes away!
9 - Don't forget: working is healthy! So leave it for the sick people!

Friday, November 25, 2005


This was a very special photograph that was taken at sunset in Kalpa,Kinnaur

Engineer !!

An engineer's 10 engineering commandments of Life

1. Thou shalt study only during the preparatory leave.
2. Thou shalt never write thy assignments thyself.
3. Thou shalt begin writing thy journals only on the morning of submission.
4. Thou shalt treat all marks above 40 as bonus.
5. Thou shalt have at least 70 per cent attendance in the canteen.
6. Thou shalt pass GRACEfully.
7. Thou shalt always be an OUTstanding student.
8. Thou shalt give thy attendance without being present...PROXY is a MUST
9. If thou can't convince them , confuse them.
10. Thou shalt start every sentence with a four-lettered word.

Engineers Anthem:
Hum Honge All Clear,Honge AllC lear, Honge All Clear Ek Din, OH-HO,Mann me hai vishwas, pura hai vishwas, hum ho! ge all clear ek din

7 ways to catch a lion

1. Newton's Method: Let, the lion catch you. For every action there is equal and opposite reaction. Implies you caught lion .

2. Einstein Method: Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion. Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.

3. Schrodinger Method: At any given moment, there is a positive probability that lion to be in the cage. So set the trap, sit down and wait!

4. Inverse Transformation Method We place a spherical cage in the forest and enter it. Perform an inverse transformation with respect to lion. Lion is in and we are out.

5. Thermodynamic Procedure: We construct a semi-permeable membrane which allows every thing to pass it except lions. Then sweep the entire forest with it.

6. Integration Differention Method: Integrate the forest over the entire area. The lion is some where in the result. So differentiate the result PARTIALLY w.r.t lion to trace out the lion.

7. The Banta's Method: DON'T EVEN TRY. YOU'LL GET CAUGHT BY THE LION.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

THE 'CHAPPEL' WAY



WAY TO GO?

why men luv UNIX

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CONCENTRATE AND STUDY WHEN THE BOOK SAYS THE FOLLOWING UNIX COMMANDS :::::::::::::::: SEE 4 YOURSELF

$ touch;
$ find;
$ finger;
$ unzip;
$ strip;
$ mount;
$ login;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ chmod;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ mv;
$ halt;
$ wait;
$ core dump;
$ unmount;
$ sleep;
$ ..
$ man


NO WONDER